Attack of the racoons

After the Niagara Falls trip, we were invited at my mom’s house in Mississauga for an overnight stay. Harry and Dooh were in my old room while lunato and I were in our new room.. thrawn’s old room. My old room is going to be skid’s new room whenever he moves back. Skid’s old room is currently thrawn’s room and thrawn’s old room is currently designated as Lunato and Sikander’s room (when we visit mom).

Close to 1 in the morning Harry heard some noise outside in the backyard. He probably has a heightened sense of hearing, just another of his super abilities he claims. He looked outside the window and saw five racoons stealing food from the bird feed. Racoons are nocturnal mammals, like Harry, and often hunt at night, like Harry.

I decided to act and told Harry to follow me. We went downstairs into the sunroom. Everyone else was asleep. I armed myself with a broom, opened the door to the patio, and stepped outside into the dark and stormy night. Harry decided to stay back, take pictures, and guard the door so that he can slam it shut in case the racoons become a threat.

I inched forward quietly. The racoons were busy eating the birdfeed and bread that my mom leaves outside daily. I lifed the broom and brought it down on the fence inches away from the closest racoon.

WHACK!!!!!

The broom hit the fence and made a defeaning noise that must’ve woken up, or at least disturbed the sexual congress, of half the neighbourhood.

I had expected the racoons to jump up in the air. I had expected them to consider me a mortal threat and scuttle away in the darkness as fast as possible. Instead, the racoon paused eating, looked up and focused it’s ghostly yellow eyes straight into my eyes while the others continued eating as if nothing had happened.

The adrenaline that had been coursing through my veins vanished as if it had never existed. The flight routines activated and took over instantaneously. “RUN!”, commanded my brain.

I turned and ran towards the door… only to find it locked already with Harry retreating backwards into the house with a fearful look on his face.

“Harry, what the f*ck !?! Let me in!”

He shook his head and pointed at the racoons.

I turned and looked; three racoons were staring at us. Oh god, oh god, oh god.

“This isn’t funny, man. Open the door!”

He laughed his evil maniacal laugh and finally moved forward to unlock the door. Fortunately the racoons were more interested in the food they had in their paws than in attacking me.

We spent the next 5 minutes looking at the racoons as they ravaged the birdfeed and ate everthing they could get their dirty, filthy paws on. Finally they climbed down the patio fence, onto the ground, and moved north into the neighbour’s backyard to devour his crops.